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Ok, here's one.

In an Greek history class, the teacher was telling us about Alexander the Great, and how he had to murder his late father's newest wife, because she was bearing his yet unborn sibling, who might take away the power from him. An apalled female student blurts out : but that's horrible! Why did the kings had so many children back then, when they knew they would slaughter each others!
Another student answers her by shouting : d'huh, because they didn't have condoms, stupid!

Right.

(no, seriously, they had birth control methods back then)

Made from intestines, and in Ancient Rome they used a special oil, I don't remember the name at the moment.

Hobo: Look, the pope!
Man: Like I'm going to fall for that!
Hobo, minutes later: Look, Batman! [Man turns and looks.]

Chick, wistfully: That was Vadim. He was from St. Petersburg. When we broke up he stole all my dresses.

Mother: I'm going to sell you to the zoo.
Child: No, sell me to Jesus!

Post by Allan

Chick, wistfully: That was Vadim. He was from St. Petersburg. When we broke up he stole all my dresses.

Do you know said person?

Nurse #1 (during break): I hope you don't mind, I took one of your cigarettes from your purse because I was really craving one.
Nurse #2: it's no problem. (pause) Wait. Was it my last one?
Nurse #1: Yeah...is that a problem?
Nurse #2 (furious): Are you fucking kidding me?!
Nurse #1: Yeah, yeah, relax! I was just kidding. There's two more in there.
Nurse #2: Oh my god. Don't joke about things like that.
Nurse #1 (nervously): Hahaha. I'd be lying if I told you I wasn't scared for my life just now.
Nurse #2 (seriously): And I'd be lying if I told you I wasn't thinking of places to hide your body.

Geneva General Hospital
Geneva, New York

Overheard by: molly guns

Nice :D

I should have posted some of the conversations I overheard when travelling on public transport.